i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
