I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
