her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
