Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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