can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
