I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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