I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
