I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
