i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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