i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
