I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Randomize
