Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize