that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize