i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
