at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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