so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
