can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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