I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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