ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize