"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
