Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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