would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
