And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
