pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
