Christians are straight up FREAKS
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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