it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Operation Purity has been aborted
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
