I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
