she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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