I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you win again, gameday.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
