bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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