Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
