I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
