My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize