So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
