bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
