my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
