The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
