No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
