We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
