the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
