My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
