Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
