yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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