508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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