so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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