also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
