I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
