I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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