Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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