Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
