Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
