Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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