its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
